I always believed that going shopping was the best meditation for me where I forgot all my mundane worries and sorrows. A visit to the mall would be far more interesting than a trip to heaven and inspite of such innate beliefs, I found myself on such spiritualistic pursuits. Well, so to say, the theories of regression and karma had always intrigued me and that is how I ended up at Swami Raj Saxena's Ashram on one fine day. What followed transformed me as an individual and changed my outlook towards others as well.

I adopted a small girl from an orphanage and started contributing 10 percent of my monthly income (before taxes) towards fulfilling her daily needs. Of course, you dear diary, are the only one who knows about this.

On my way to Swamiji's Ashram I took a break at 'Aasra' (the orphanage), said hi to my little friend and then proceeded further. It was a ritual I never missed - something like buying offerings for the Almighty before entering the temple. Swamiji was in his usual jeans and Kurta when I reached his place. Although I had pretty much got used to seeing him in this manner, I still remember the first time I had set my eyes on him. In his Levi's and Lacoste T-shirt, he could be selling anything but 'Spiritualism'.

I soon learned that he was an MBA from one of the premier institutes of the country and ran his own business of manufacturing bottle caps. The wave of serenity that swept his face and tranquility that seemed to be permanently residing on his sharp and attractive features, gave him the semblance of a hermit from the Himalayas, but his attire is what confused a novice. Everything about him - right from his mobile to his laptop and his car screamed of his penchant for technology and gadgets and yet he called himself a 'Guru'.

As I sat on the imported cane furniture adorning his lawn, staring at the endless rows of lanterns that hung from the byzantine array of roots that hung from the banyan trees, Swami Raj Saxena scanned my face for hints on the purpose of my visit. I eventually informed him of my dilemma revealing the actual reason for my visit. I narrated the entire episode of how Shaumitro and Raghav had met each other and how the former had confessed of his being in love with the latter.

I asked him if I should arrange for the two to meet up for a date, given the fact that I was well aware of the presence of Sarica in Raghav's life. He listened with rapt attention without as much twitching an eyebrow at the mention of a 'gay relationship'. "What is it that you want to know?" He asked me at the end of my narration.

"I want to know what karmic bearings would such an action have on my own love life," said I.

He simply smiled. But, instead of spoon feeding a solution to my problem, He said, "We see our present and plan our future. But God sees our future and plans our present. Always trust the master planner" - he also advised me to meditate regularly.

He further said, "Isha, I understand you are a sensitive person but certain decisions cannot be taken in haste so give it some time and all your answers will come rushing to you like water filling up an empty vessel."

Though partly convinced by Guruji, I still had one unanswered question - Does even Raghav reciprocate Shaumitro's feelings? I needed to find that out before I decided on my future course of action. On my way to the office I parked my car in a lonely stretch of land so that I could call Raghav.

To be continued...

See below to read previous entries
The Diary of a Desi Girl Volume 5 - My Karmic Dilemma
The Diary of a Desi Girl Volume 4 - The Vishal Effect
The Diary of a Desi Girl Volume 3 - I Break My Rules... Well Almost
The Diary of a Desi Girl Volume 2
The Diary of a Desi Girl Volume 1